Mama Didn't Raise No Heathen!

As a young adult, I used to shun my Catholic upbringing; I strongly disliked going to Catholic school and Catholic church all of my life.  The nuns terrified me – they were pompous, mean penguins.  I detested the ugly, itchy plaid uniform skirts we had to wear and worst of all, the public school kids in my neighborhood hated my brother and I simply because – wait for it- we attended Catholic school; they chased us home every day and threatened to beat us up!  Like most good Catholics, by the time I entered my late 20’s, I was in therapy for all of my Catholic guilt issues.  What I disliked more than the nuns, the uniform and the daily threat of a beat down, were all of the Catholic church rituals we had to partake in – they were nonsense-cal as far as I was concerned.  Stand, sit, kneel.  Stand, sit, kneel…..

And let’s not forget going to confession in that tiny, claustrophobic booth.  I mean really, was saying 10 Our Father’s and 5 Hail Mary’s really going to save me from hell for stealing a Sweet n’ Sour sucker from the candy store?  As strong as my resentments were for all things Catholic, I harbored an equally strong resentment against my mother for insisting on raising us Catholic but not being Catholic herself. She never attended mass with my brother and I; she always sent the two of us by ourselves.  I wanted my mom there by my side, like all of the other families that came every Sunday for worship; I longed for her presence.  That was her mistake… As a result of my resentment, I vowed that when I had children of my own, I wouldn't send them off to church by themselves, but rather share in the worship experience with them.

Now that I’m all grown-up and raising my own family, I’m no longer a Catholic club card member. Christian, but not Catholic.  And I've relinquished all of my guilt and resentments of all things Catholic.  Moreover, I've gained a healthy perspective and a new found appreciation for what my mother did instill in my brother and I by insisting on raising us Catholic – she gave us a fundamental belief in God; a foundation that we could trust and a basis for worship.  Mama didn't raise no heathen!

Now if we are children, then we are heirs - heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if we indeed we share in His sufferings, in order that we may also share in His glory.  Romans 8:17

My oldest son, Joshua, asked if he could skip going to church today.  He explained that if he went to church today, he wouldn't be able to complete all of his chores and homework in time to catch the NFL game and a rare opportunity to play video games with a friend.  Skip church?  How did he determine that church/worship would be the “something” that he would have to give up in light of all that he had to do?  For a moment I had a Catholic-church-flashback.  I remembered my outlandish attempts to ditch going to mass on Sunday and I had to wonder, does Josh have that same angst about the church to which we belong?  Nah!  Josh loves our church and they love him; they've embraced us as family.  And Josh loves going to church with his family – serving together, worshiping together and fellow-shipping together.  Josh wanting to skip church was just him being a typical teenager and Josh wanting to “do” Josh.  You can bet your rosary beads that this mama ain't raising no heathens either!

Thanks & Giving

It’s Thanksgiving time!  Time for families to gather around the dinner table and give thanks for the first fruits of harvest.   I love to hear stories of elaborate meal planning and creative rituals families have crafted to honor this national tradition.   I’m also grateful for all of the efforts and loving sacrifices made to feed the hungry.  I believe that this time-honored American tradition of thanks and giving brings out the best that humanity has to offer.  The season of Thanksgiving is a time for us to focus our hearts and minds on being grateful for all of His wonderful blessings –like family, food and shelter, and to bless others with sacrificial giving.  And although this time of year is deemed for Thanksgiving, God’s command to us is to practice thanks and giving all throughout the year.

“Give and it will be given to you.  A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap.  For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.”  Luke 6:38

“Enter into His gates with thanksgiving and into His courts with praise.  Be thankful to Him and bless His name.  Psalm 100:4

To that end, I recently witnessed the most awesome example of giving.  Last Friday evening, I invited two moms of children with special needs over to my home for dinner and a play date with Malachi and what a joyful, blessed time we had!  Emma, a beautiful little girl with a big heart and a vibrant spirit, took center stage as soon as she crossed the threshold of my front door.

“Dog! Dog!” Emma shouted. 

Emma beamed with delight as Roscoe greeted her with friendly wags and sniffs.  She repeatedly stroked his curly locks and instantly they became an inseparable pair for the remainder of the evening.  Emma’s introduction to Malachi was equally energetic.

“Hi!  Hi! Emma boomed as she gently stroked his arm.

 Malachi, who had been watching a movie in his bedroom, looked Emma up and down for a considerable amount of time before he said, “Hi!” back on his Dynavox. 

“My room!”  Malachi informed Emma on his Dynavox. 

“See ya, see ya later” Malachi said. 

He was eager to return to watching his movie.  Emma was not at all offended; she had way too much exploring of this new environment on her mind. 

 Shortly thereafter, Earl, a shy little boy with big brown eyes and a wide grin, joined the party.  Like Malachi, Earl was immobile, so his mom carried him to and fro.  Emma’s mom offered to carry Earl while Earl’s mom got herself situated.  Earl easily accepted the transition; he wrapped his arms lovingly around her neck and nestled his head gingerly on her shoulder for a cuddle-hug.  Throughout the evening, the children took their time getting to know one another.  Emma and Malachi “talked” to one another on their Dynvox.  Malachi and Earl communicated through eye gazing.  And Emma and Earl created a communication between themselves that was a mix of Emma’s unrecognizable babble and Earl’s huge smiles.  For all of the challenges these children carried, unconditional love was not one of them; they gave all of themselves to one another.  It’s as if their differences were invisible to one another.  They found a way to communicate acceptance and love.

 After dinner, the children sat in the front room watching, The Lion King on the big flat screen TV.  Malachi was stretched out on the sofa and Emma and Earl were sitting on the floor.  Emma was “chatting” Earl up and he was loving it! Periodically, his mouth broke out into a big, beautiful smile and his eyes danced with delight.  Without any hesitation, Emma reached over to Earl and wiped his mouth with his bib.  And a moment later, Emma reached back to pat Malachi on his leg.  He glanced at her and blinked yes – “Yes, we are showing the world the value of thanks and giving.”

 

“It is not our differences that divide us.  It is our inability to recognize, accept and celebrate those differences.”  Audrey Lord

 

HAPPY THANKSGIVING 2012!