Time In A Bottle

Draw near to God, and He will draw near to you.  Cleanse your hands, you sinners; and purify your hearts, you double-minded.  James 4:8

 There are three words that my husband, Maurice, can say to me that will melt my heart.  Three little words that make me stand at attention.  Three words that propel me to action – and no, it’s not I love you.  When he says, I love you, I take that as a declaration of our commitment; an affirmation of what we share and what we feel for one another.   But when my husband says, “I miss you,” well, that says something completely different to my spirit.......

Just the other day, I was in my usual frantic mode of hurry and scurry; I was getting dressed for work when the phone rang – it was Maurice. 

“Hey!  How you doin’?”  He asked.

“I’m okay, just getting ready for work...  Got a meeting at 10:30.  I hope the traffic’s not bad...what’s up with you?” I asked, eager to get off the phone and out of the house.

I had the phone cradled against my ear and shoulder as I sat perched on the edge of my bed, gingerly pulling on my stockings.

“Nothing much.  Just driving in to work and I wanted to call you and tell you (pause) that I miss you- and I miss us.”  He said.

I stopped easing the stocking up my leg, removed the phone from the crook of my shoulder and neck and sat up straight.

“Awwww!  Really?”  I crooned, my voice cracking.  I closed my eyes, drew in a deep breath and smiled as I exhaled.  He had me at, “I miss you.”

Like most married couples raising a family, we are stressed and overwhelmed with the multitude of roles, responsibilities, tasks and commitments that we assume and that consume us on a daily basis.   For all that we do for our family and for others, we are increasingly finding it difficult to spend time being with one another.  During those times, Maurice and I jokingly refer to one another as “ship” – a reference to ships passing in the night...

When my husband says, I miss you, my spirit hears a yearning to engage in what matters most - matters of the heart.  I am speaking about the issues that rest deep in the heart, otherwise known as, the basement issues of my heart.  For me, I miss you means I’ve neglected spending time with you, and I want to be in your presence. I miss you means I want to share with you my hurts, my securities, my fears, my fantasies, my hopes and my dreams.   I miss you means I need to feel your full embrace.  And while I know that I miss you is a call to action, a plea to spend time together, I’m just happy that our relationship has evolved to that level of love, trust and intimacy; I am happy for the spirit-to-spirit connection that we’ve cultivated in the midst of this crazy, chaotic life we are living.   I never take what we have for granted; I don’t rest on that foundation because we’ve worked hard to get to this place in our marriage.   I realize the value of our time together and the more I submit to it, the quality of our relationship becomes richer.

The landscape for my relationship with God is very similar to the missing you scenario I’ve described with my husband.  That is, there have been moments in my relationship with God when I have felt we were passing each other like ships in the night; times when I have missed the opportunity to bask in His presence and He has missed the pleasure of my company.   I have been caught up in the hustle and bustle of life and have not submitted to His call.  During those times, I find myself doing the same thing with God that I do with my husband – having a quick, on-the-run check-in.  Skimming through devotion.   Half-hearted praise.  Rehearsed prayers...  Having a quick on-the-run check-in is like feeding a cracker to a starving man – it doesn’t satisfy; you crave for something that will fill you up.  A starving man craves food.  A starving heart craves affection.  A starving spirit craves time with our God. 

Like missing my husband, I miss my quality time with God.  My spirit yearns to connect with Him and share what is deep in my heart.  I yearn to be in His presence and feel His comforting embrace.  I’m happy to know Him and to have His love, but I miss Him- our intimate time together means so much to me...

Early this morning, I came running up the basement stairs with laundry in my arms and as I flung open the basement door, I was taken aback by the bright and vibrant burst of sunlight that overwhelmed the room.  My first thought was, “Wow! Look at God!”  And He said, “Now that I have your attention, I miss you!”

He had me at, “I miss you.”

QUESTION OF THE DAY:  What are you missing in your relationship with your significant “other?”