Friday, October 19, 2012

Blessed Assurance- written by Maurice Chapman


There was a song we sang in church when I was younger called Blessed Assurance, perhaps you know it. http://library.timelesstruths.org/music/Blessed_Assurance/   It’s an upbeat song that declares,
 Blessed assurance, Jesus is mine, Oh, what a foretaste of glory divine, Heir of salvation, purchased of God, Born of His Spirit, washed in His blood”.  The words I could always sing without reading the words were, “This is my story, this is my song, praising my Savior all the daylong”. 

I must admit, I never really appreciated or understood what those words meant until I lived a little longer…

As many of you well know, in 1999, our youngest son, Malachi, was diagnosed with a neuromuscular condition known as Spinal Muscular Atrophy (SMA,) Type 1.  We were informed that SMA is the leading cause of death for children under the age of two from a genetic disorder.  The most optimistic prognosis for Malachi was about 2-3 years!  But, his quality of life would be severely hindered; he would never walk, talk or move on his own, they said.  He would never live without his ventilator, which is essentially life support for him.  The doctors were vague enough to say that with new technology, we may have to write history if Malachi were to survive.  My wife, Dena rolled up her sleeves and led the charge to learn the clinical skills to manage Malachi’s care and she made sure that I and all of Malachi’s care providers not only learned his care too, but also honored the standard of care she put in place.

We were blessed with devoted nurses in the hospital.  We were encouraged by the outpouring of love and support from our faith community, as friends and family learned to care for Malachi.   Some folks prepared meals for us, while others offered to spend time with Joshua, our oldest child.  But for those first two years, Dena and I went through an extremely dark, scary and lonely journey of uncertainty, fear and grief.  Emotionally, spiritually, psychologically, and mentally, we were preparing ourselves to lose a child!  We were never given permission to dream of a positive future for our youngest son, and that hurt like hell!

The initial years at home with Malachi were very difficult on us as a family, and especially for Dena and me as a couple.  Skilled high-tech private duty nursing was (and still is) sparse.  The complexity of Malachi’s case intimidated many nurses, and we had to adjust to strangers in your home as frequently as they were.  The truth is that many nights we had no nurse, so I would stay up until 2AM, and then Dena would stay up until 7AM when a nurse arrived and then, I would go to work – exhausted!  During my “shift” of caring for Malachi, I would often fall asleep.

One night on my shift, I had a dream.  I dreamt that Malachi had come off the ventilator and the alarms did not sound- or I slept through them...   In the dream, I “woke up” and ran into Mal’s room and realized that his trach site was healed, and he was off of the vent!  Well, the shock of the dream awakened me, and I checked on Mal and everything was fine.  I drifted back to sleep on the sofa when this time I heard a voice.  It was a clear voice, but I was unable to determine who it was speaking to me.  The message was profound, prophetic and pronounced… “Malachi is going to be fine.  He’ll be here a while. You must take care of yourself and each other.  Don’t worry about Malachi.”

Okay, you have my attention now.  I sat up on the sofa and thought about my dream.  It was with great apprehension that I shared my dream with Dena, because I didn’t want her to scoff at me nor did I want to “jinx” my dream. 

More than ten years later, I can reflect on that dream and acknowledge with unabated certainty that God spoke hope into my spirit.  He literally entered my consciousness to offer a “Blessed Assurance” of our miraculous future with Malachi (Messenger of God) Maurice Chapman.  Our family is so much richer today as a result of the “echoes of mercy and whispers of love”. 

·         I have learned that it is important to pray to God for our needs, and to thank Him for His many blessings, but it is more important to be still and listen.  Despite the promise that was whispered in my ear, I had my doubts and fears. Yet, I NEVER dreamed of Malachi becoming a teenager!

·         I have witnessed adversity making me stronger and strengthening my marriage, but we both struggled with the discomfort of stress, fatigue and doubt.  We just never quit!  Today we are breathing in the joy, hope and strength of one another’s love.

·         I have learned to take a moment to be grateful for what is divine, true and pure.  We live in the midst of a miracle every day!

I have learned to strive to live by Philippians 4:8-9 which states,

8 Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.

9 Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.”

Truly, I know the meaning of “Blessed Assurance”.

Perfect submission, all is at rest,
I in my Savior am happy and blest,
Watching and waiting, looking above,
Filled with His goodness, lost in His love.

Francis J. Crosby

This is my story, this is my song!!!

Question of the Day: What blessed assurance has God shown you?  What can you dream about that you couldn't before?

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Very inspiring Maurice!

Twana

Dena said...

Thank u Sistah :)